Saturday 26 April 2008

Bugs by the Bucket load!

If you have seen the episode "Bugs" of Supernatural you know how nasty it can get.

My occasional encounters with bugs are usually not of the spooky kind, but twice as nasty.

Every evening I try to be good and I drag myself outside for a nice long walk down by the biggest man made lake in the UK.

Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy those walks and I love nature, but what I don’t like are those damn bugs. They are everywhere. Black clouds of them and there seems to be no escape.

I guess, technically speaking they are mosquito like insects, not bugs, but then it wouldn’t be so much fun to say “those damn bugs bug the hell out of me”.

Usually I go mountain biking round the lake, but not lately. Although I have one of these Buff bandana-scarves that can double as a mouth cover that make you look like a bandit, it’s still no pleasure to hit a could of them bugs. It feels like someone is shooting at you with a rice gun.

I don’t know how some fellow bikers do it who don’t have such a wonderful weapon of defence round their face. I suck at holding my breath, 30 seconds and I am out. Then what do you do? Draw a brea….aaaahhhh bugs! Cough! Spit! Choke! Curse! Repeat!

These bugs have a talent to get everywhere I don’t want them to be, like my eyes or my mouth. So even a simple thing, like say going for a walk turns out to be a major adventure.

Thankfully no one is around that late in the day to see me running off the path trying to avoid those dooming clouds of nastiness, arms waving everywhere, even yelling “get away from me” and “leave me alone”. Yeah right, as if that’s going to help.

I know I must seem like a complete lunatic but really I couldn’t care less. In times like these I miss having unhealthy friends by my side smoking 10 packs of cigarettes a day. They were useful bug repellents back in the days.

So it had me thinking, that maybe my only option left is to get a plastic bucket, cut some eyeholes in them, cover them with see-through plastic (it would be pretty stupid not to) and just walk around like that.

On second thought, I don’t think I will set any trends with that, so if anyone has a good bug repellent for me, please do let me know.

I also take bug-exorcisms as a last resort.



-posted by Nana-

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